And I’m Like… (Going Old School in Mid-South Wresting March 30th 1984)

We last left off in WWF with Hulk Hogan won his first World Championship in January. We jump forward two months and see what is happening in Bill Watts promotion Mid-South Wrestling.

Mid-South Opening- 

 Boyd Pierce does not open the show.. you know who does? Jim F’N Ross!! Looking young too. He speaks much than before. He says we will see a semi final match for the television title. Also, Mr. Wrestling II will be here as he is the North American Champion. Then the sweet cheesy 80’s synth music starts up to get us pumped for the show!!

  Holy Shit you guys… Jim Ross and Jim Cornette are our announcers for tonight!! That blows my mind, two of the greatest minds in wrestling, being all young and shit. Jim Cornette is going by “The Louisville Lip” as Ross goes through the card tonight, Cornette cuts him off “Why are you so concerned with trivial matters Jim Ross? Tell them that I have the Midnight Express, The Mid-South Tag Team Champions.” Cornette then goes on to talk and talk and talk about how great they are. Cornette says that Watts is not able to fulfill his obligations so Cornette is filling in for Bill Watts.

Midnight Express- In 1980 a new team was formed in Southeast Championship Wrestling (SECW) when Dennis Condrey’s previous partner Don Carson retired. Condrey teamed up with Randy Rose and won the NWA Southeast Tag Team Championship shortly after they started teaming up. The team started a storyline feud with Norvell Austin. In an attempt to throw Rose and Condrey off Austin would adopt the masked persona of “The Shadow” and together with Brad Armstrong. After the title loss Austin turned on Armstrong and joined up with Condrey and Rose to form The Midnight Express. In the book The Pro Wrestling Hall of Fame: The Tag Teams Condrey explains that the name did not stem from the movie Midnight Express (although later versions of the Midnight Express would use the film’s theme by Giorgio Moroder as their theme music) but from the fact that they all dressed in black, drove black cars, and were out partying past midnight. Together the three men would win the AWA Southern Tag Team title in the CWA and invoke a rule that’d later be referred to as the Freebird Rule which allowed any two of the three men to defend the titles on a given night so that their opponents never knew what combination to expect. The Midnight Express would lose the AWA Southern tag team title to Bobby Eaton and Sweet Brown Sugar before returning to SECW in the spring of 1982. After dropping the Southeastern Tag Team titles to Brad and Scott Armstrong, Austin, Condrey and Rose went their separate ways. When Bobby Eaton was sent to Mid-South Wrestling under promoter Bill Watts as a part of a talent trade it was decided that he should be part of the new version of the Midnight Express. Eaton teamed with former rival Dennis Condrey under the management of Jim Cornette to form a new version of the Midnight Express. The Express had up until this point been a group of wrestlers, but once Eaton and Condrey joined together the Midnight Express worked exclusively as a two-man team. To compliment “Loverboy” Dennis, Eaton was nicknamed “Beautiful Bobby”, a nickname he still uses. The Express was first booked with the Mid-South Tag Team champions Magnum T.A. and Mr. Wrestling II. The highlight of the angle saw Eaton and Condrey tarring and feathering Magnum TA in the middle of the ring. With Mr. Wrestling II and Magnum TA splitting up, the Midnight Express needed a new team to defend their newly won titles against. This team was The Rock ‘n’ Roll Express (Ricky Morton and Robert Gibson), whom they started a long-running series of matches that would run well into the 1990s and span several wrestling promotions. The two Expresses had a series of matches which differed so much from the way tag team wrestling was traditionally presented at the time, that it gathered a lot of attention both locally and nationally.

Midnight Express Celebration- 

   
I feel like this same damn thing happens about 3 years later for WCW. Cornette said as he cuts the cake “you won’t get a piece” As the Midnight Express celebrates on the other side of the ring, The Rock ‘n’ Roll Express slams Cornette’s face into the cake. Bill is fake laughing REAL REAL hard, and Boyd points out how beautiful it all is. Cornette is full of icing and cake and Ross laughs into the microphone. Jim Cornette comes up to do an interview after he cleaned all the cake off of his face. He is super embarrassed, he knows where he has cake. “I am a Cornette, I talked to my momma’s attorneys. I am gonna sue everyone.” Bill Watts says “If your mother wants to sue somebody, sue me.” Cornette says he thinks Bill Watts is washed up and thinks he is John Wayne. Cornette says he will call his mother and says she will buy part of Mid-South so Cornette can be a co-owner. “I am gonna have your geeky looking son is gonna be selling Midnight Express T-Shirts.” Bill Watts says “I run out of words when I argue and I use my fists..” Bill walks away, Cornette grabs him and Watts SLAPS THE SOUTHERN out of Cornette. So hard, that was a smkeep tracck if I ever heard one. 

    
 And I’m Like… That was a crazy segment. I feel like these are highlight shows or something. Every Mid-South episode is so fast and furious and super hard to keep track of, especially when Jim Cornette is talking. The talent is very evident for the Jim’s, even though they are so young.

We go back to the Mid-South announce booth and Cornette is going crazy about how his mom will buy this company and he will be in charge. Jim says he has never been hit so hard in his life. He told the Midnight Express to not let anyone hit him.

Bill Watts interview pre-tape- 

   
He is interviewing Butch Reed and Cornette is watching from a distance. Watts keeps cutting of Reed and motioning to Cornette by saying “Someone get this sissy out of here” Midnight Express shows up and beats the holy hell out of Watts. Cornette whips him with his belt and Butch Reed just walks away. Then The Rock ‘n’ Roll come out for the save. Cornette sits and gloats. 

   
And I’m Like… Laughing at Butch Reed leaving Bill Watts to be eaten by the wolves. Jim Ross says Bill Watts settles scores uniquely and is one of the greatest wrestlers of all time.

  Bill Watts leaves a statement. “I think all sports are out of control, the world is. More and more people need to take matters into their own hands. Now when I retired from wrestling it was by choice. I got into professional wrestling knowing you gotta lose to win. When thugs try to force their rule, by tar and feathering them, or whipping them. I lost my temper and had to shut a sissy up. This country was made by people standing up for what’s right. I do not apologize for slapping your face sissy.” Watts wants to humiliate Cornette, he says the stampede is back. 

 Cornette keeps saying “a mouth is full of memories”. Jim Ross says Bill Watts will join us momentarily.

Cornette took off and now we are talking to Bill. Bill won’t fine him because his mom just pays for that. Watts says there is three of the Midnight Express so he needs some good partners. He says he is in good shape but he can’t go on a long campaign so he wants just one match with all the marbles on it. Jim Ross and Bill Watts bring a video of the two of them going to get a team member in the Carolina’s.

  We see a guy lifting weights in the woods. It’s like a creepy video of someone stalking another person. We cut to the three guys all talking by the lake and the boombox get’s shut off. Bill Watts finds the Junkyard Dog. JYD says he lost a match that said he would be gone for 90 days, he has got to keep his word. Watts points out how he helped JYD when the Dog was blinded by the Freebirds. JYD said “my word is my bond” so he has got to be gone for 90 days. Bill Watts says he respects that and JYD is the only man left that keeps his word in this world. They go through circles in the conversation again. Until the very end when JYD says he knows somebody, but he owes him money so Bill has to go talk to him. JYD tells Bill Watts to find Stagger Lee. JYD says Stagger hides in the woods so we will have to find him. You think Stagger Lee is the dad of Willow? 

    
 Jim Ross and Bill Watts then tell us they will show us another video of Jim Ross meeting Stagger Lee in the woods. Ross has to be blindfolded.

He walks very tepid and Stagger yells at Ross to keep off the property and show his face. Ross says JYD sent him and Stagger gets pissed cause JYD owes him money. Stagger Lee says Bill Watts don’t want the Dog he want Stagger Lee cause Stagger Lee don’t steal money. Ross says Watts really needs help. Stagger Lee says he will help Watts if he gets paid a lot.

Jim Ross tells Bill, Stagger is on his way. We are now cutting to Stagger Lee’s debut against Ted Dibiase. This was in 1982.

And I’m Like… Not sure when to stop and review the segment when this show just bleeds segments into each other. This is crazy, the first half of the episode is dedicated to a feud that doesn’t involve wrestlers. Then we slowly see the build but I don’t think we will see the blow off match. That is a funny storyline though, we all know Stagger Lee is the Junkyard Dog and for them to have Stagger Lee standing in the woods wearing a mask and a white jumpsuit is so f’n ridiculous you can’t help but love it.

Ted Dibiase vs. Stagger Lee 

   
Stagger Lee runs into the ring and the whole match lasts 45 minutes. “Stagger Lee was the guy who would beat up JYD and take his lunch money” Says Bill Watts as Stagger Lee beats Dibiase with a powerslam. Jim Ross calls him an awesome wrestler. Now we are going to see a Bill Watts video package…….

It’s got some rock style drums and we see video of Bill Watts beating up Terry Funk.. a young Terry Funk. Look at that kick to the face… Watts punches look so real too. 

 This video is basically every guy you knew that was somebody in wrestling is getting beat up by Bill Watts. Watts thinks he is the greatest of all time, you can tell by the way he runs his promotion. I don’t know how I feel about this. We now go back to the interview.

   

  

  

 Watts says he is teaming with Stagger Lee and gonna put Jim Cornette in Jim’s mothers dress. “I think Cornette will look real slick in this dress.” Watts also said “Cornette has never learned how to not drink milk out of a bottle.” Bill says he will put a stipulation on the match to make sure Cornette is “one embarrassed sissy”. He says he would use a pacifier but Cornette won’t have teeth…

And I’m Like… Can we be done with Bill Watts please? This really needs to end, the whole show is devoted to this damn match. It isn’t even on this episode..

  Mr. Wrestling II vs. Mike Jackson 

 Mr. Wrestling says he no longer Mr. Wrestling II but he is Mr. Wrestling.

Mr. Wrestling II- In 1972, Walker was semi-retired and running a gas station in Tennessee. The Georgia promoter, Paul Jones, and his booker Leo Garibaldi asked for him to return to wrestling as the masked Mr. Wrestling II. Introduced originally as the partner of the original Mr. Wrestling (Tim Woods), Walker would take his place in many instances. Eddie Graham, the owner of the NWA Florida promotion, was also a part owner of the Georgia promotion. Graham was sending talent back and forth between the two promotions, due to the promotional war which occurred in Atlanta over a dispute with Ray Gunkel‘s widow Ann Gunkel and her “outlaw promotion” All-South Wrestling Alliance. Walker as Wrestling II became an immediate top draw and legend for the territory, leading to ten reigns as the Georgia Heavyweight Champion. During Walker’s time in Georgia as Wrestling II, he was considered one of the top five most popular wrestlers in the United States. He also attracted a high-profile fan in Jimmy Carter, at the time the governor of Georgia. While most of his career during the 1970s and 1980s was focused on the southeastern corner of the United States, he also made a prominent appearance in Mid-South Wrestling during 1983 and 1984 as the coach and mentor of a young wrestler named Terry Allen. Vignettes aired on television, hosted by either Reisor Bowden or Jim Ross, in which Wrestling II was shown away from the ring with T.A. discussing his philosophy in taking on a rising young star in the role of a “coach” or showing training sessions with the two. As a tag team, they also won the promotion’s tag team title from Butch Reed and Jim Neidhart on December 25, 1983. Subtle seeds of resentment were planted along the way, which led to the pair splitting and feuding. Wrestling II turned his back on T.A. in a tag team match against The Midnight Express, which saw T.A. bloodied. On the following week’s program, Wrestling II threw in the towel to cost T.A. the match while he was participating in the tournament for the promotion’s television title, claiming that T.A. was too badly cut to continue.

Mike Jackson- Didn’t have a bio but is STILL WRESTLING!! Check out his Facebook page.

   

  

 Magnum T.A. asked Mike if he could wrestle instead. Mr. Wrestling said he signed a contract to wrestle Mike Jackson, not T.A. Magnum said he learned a lot from Mr. Wrestling and then he punched the man in the face.

Mr. Wrestling is contemplating having the match. He says to Magnum T.A. “I am not in charge anymore, I am not my own man. I have to wrestle who ‘they’ tell me too.” He says they and references his belt. Magnum says if he loses he will leave Mid-South. “a man can’t be humiliated more than being slapped. Magnum slaps him in the face and Wrestling bails.

And I’m Like… This is such a Monday Night Raw template. The matches never finish or even get started and the first 20 minutes is just talking. I wonder why the WWE Network put this episode on.

Jim Ross tells us that Hacksaw Jim Duggan fended off Krusher Kruschev with a 2×4. We go to Duggan vs. Mr. Saito in progress. Duggan hits a spear on Saito and Volkoff comes out with a board. Kruschev comes out but Jim Ross still calls him Barry Darsow. Darsow was wearing a coalminers glove and he punched through the board. Rock ‘n’ Roll and Magnum T.A. came out for the save. 

    
   
Boyd Pierce comes out and announces the next match. Jim Ross is the sole commentator.

   

 Nicolai Volkoff vs. ‘Hacksaw’ Jim Duggan 

 Duggan hits the ring so hard and starts pummeling Volkoff. They are doing the “yay/boo” spot to open the contest. Duggan is being called the All-American. Duggan hits a spear on Volkoff and three dudes hit the ring. As the battle starts all the roster comes out and the bell won’t stop ringing, the crowd is screaming, Ross doesn’t know how to call it and it’s pure chaos. 

    
    
 And I’m Like… I don’t know if Mid-South had an actual match. Like a match with a beginning, middle and end. I just don’t get it. We cut from match to segment to match to segment but it’s just highlights of the moments. If they were video packages maybe I would feel less against them. At the moment though.. What the hell Mid-South, how can I even relate or get invested in any of the roster if they are on screen maybe 2 minutes.

  Terry Taylor vs. ‘Hacksaw’ Butch Reed 

 As Terry is in the ring Boyd says we are waiting on Butch Reed. Makes me wonder if the match is even happening.

Oh geez.. Butch Reed comes out with a wrapped shoulder. Pee Wee Anderson is the referee. It’s like WCW took everyone from Mid-South that WWF didn’t take. Butch Reed says he is too injured, he wants it next week.

Boyd says “either wrestle or forfeit the match” Terry doesn’t let Butch decide and goes all 2000’s babyface and attacks the injured man. 

   
Butch Reed puts the coalminers glove on, and shoves the referee out of the ring. Reed hits Taylor in the arm and stomach. It’s like a glove that causes cancer or something. Sure it looks like a tinfoiled glove but at the same time it causes SO MUCH DAMAGE!! Rock ‘n’ Roll Express came out to make a save. 

   
And I’m Like… I KNEW THIS WOULDN’T BE A MATCH!! Like, damn, Ross welcomes us back to the show and says Butch Reed has been expelled from the tournament. Jim Ross says Terry Taylor advances even though he made the preemptive strike.

Boyd Pierce is announcing again… Let’s see if we can actually have a damn match!

  Masao Ito vs. Larry Santana 

 Masao Ito- Not much is found on him.

Larry Santana- Nothing is found on him either.

Masao looks super interesting, I wish I could know more about him. He is destroying Larry Santana. Strikes and body slams and kicks. Masao kicks him in the face and hits a sit-out piledriver. Picks him back up, hits a clap on Santana’s ears. Hits a headbutt and a kick to the head. Ito hit a chop for the win. 

    
 And I’m Like… The Full matches are just as long as the damn interviews and highlights!!! What the hell!! Jim Ross wants to reshow the damn Bill Watts video package. I don’t think a promoter loved himself more than Bill Watts. He thought he was the greatest of all time.

  This episode was not fun. It had a lot going on but never gave you a moment to truly enjoy. Just ADD as hell. Props to the Rock ‘n’ Roll Express for saving every single good guy on the show.

Until Next Week where we review Tuesday Night Titans!

You all have a good one. If you are feeling down, just think of yourself like Bill Watts would think of himself.

-Jake

 

 

 

 

 

 

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